Dr. Grordbort's : Dr Grordbort's Silver Signet Ring

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Countless patent applications have been sealed with the crest of Grordbort Industries, so we therefore invite the minions of planet Terra to gawk at their own faithful replica of the good Doctor's prized trinket.

Cast in Sterling Silver, this exquisite piece not only enhances the appearance of most wearers, but also offers some protection against COR (Catastrophic Oscillatory Reflux) which continues to plague sportsmen who boldly decline protective gear and with admirable gusto apply their sweaty palms directly to the butt of their raygun.

Dr Grordbort's Signet Ring comes in three diametrical variations:

• SMALL: US Size 6 1/2 = 17 mm

• MEDIUM: US Size 9 = 19 mm SOLD OUT

• LARGE: US Size 12 1/2 = 22 mm SOLD OUT

To obtain a good fit, please follow the instructions:

1. Locate a strip of paper or parchment, the thinner, the better. And a writing instrument.
2. Wrap the strip around the part of your anatomy intended for beautification. One generous lap will do the trick.
3. Mark the paper at the exact point where overlappage occurs.
4. Measure with a ruler the distance from the end of the strip to the marked point
5. Divide the circumference by Pi (3.142) to mathematically ascertain the correct diameter of your limb
6. Compare your result to the table above and choose wisely